October 13, 2022 -   In New York, there is a statute that gives a surviving spouse the right to elect against the Will of a deceased spouse, if that Will leaves them with less than the greater of a third of the estate or $50,000. In a prenup, you can waive that Right of Election if circumstances warrant it. Mediation is a good place to talk about your expectations and what would be appropriate to maintain your standard of living. If you would like more information about mediation a [...]

September 15, 2022 - {3 minutes to read} If you and your spouse have a lot of conflict between you, you're going to want to have as much detail as possible in your parenting agreement. Here are a few tips that can help you to achieve that during your mediation.  1. Speak Up.    Clearly, your mediator is going to be aware of the level of conflict between the two of you and will raise the issues that are most commonly addressed in Separation Agreements in terms of parent [...]

April 20, 2022 - {3 minutes to read} When I meet with clients who will have difficulty in making joint decisions about their children after the Separation Agreement is signed, the first thing we do is discuss a structure that will help them. If their level of conflict is so high that even after such a process, they STILL will be in conflict, we will discuss if they could agree to one parent making the final decisions. Or having one parent make final decisions regarding education issues [...]

March 15, 2022 - In a matrimonial consultation, the attorney will give a lot of legal advice and information in a very lengthy meeting. My initial consultations are limited to a half-hour and all we do is talk about the process of mediation. In that meeting, the parties meet me and learn about how mediation works. Most people who call me are not familiar with mediation, and at such an emotionally fraught time in their lives, I can't imagine that they would want to embark upon a process [...]

February 2, 2022 - No one can tell you how long your divorce will take. If you are litigating, you are at the mercy of your attorney’s schedule, your spouse’s attorney’s schedule, the judge’s timetable and the court’s agenda. This can increase the level of anxiety and uncertainty that you feel. In mediation, the timetable is up to you and your spouse. [...]

December 16, 2021 - {4 minutes to read} The most typical way a pension is divided would be through a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO). A QDRO provides that, at retirement, the marital portion of the pension will be divided in the way that you have agreed upon in your Separation Agreement, usually 50%. The marital portion is the part that accumulated during the marriage. But you’re in mediation, so you don’t have to do what is typically done. Especially if the QDRO does [...]

October 11, 2021 -   When you involve a consulting attorney, you want one who is a proponent of mediation. One who will help you acquire the skills and tools to advocate for yourself. The discussion in mediation can then be more mutual and result in terms that are more reasonable. In mediation, parties are empowered by making their own decisions and being an advocate for themselves. [...]

August 12, 2021 -   There are many special occasions to share in your life and the lives of your children. When divorcing, however, those occasions can become mini-battlegrounds, causing discomfort to visitors and your children. If you have children, you will be co-parenting for life. In mediation, we can build in ways to handle conflicts as the lives of you and your children move forward. [...]

May 18, 2021 - {3 minutes to read} The idea of a prenuptial agreement is familiar to most people — an agreement that a couple can enter into before their marriage that can provide how property and debt will be distributed in the event of death or a divorce. It can also provide for paying or waiving spousal support. But what exactly is a postnuptial agreement, and why would anyone want one? A postnuptial agreement is an agreement that a married couple can create to do the very th [...]

April 30, 2021 - {4 minutes to read} I often receive phone calls from potential clients telling me that they have settled everything and just want me to write up their agreement. When faced with this request, I explain that this is not what I do and why mediation would still be important even if they have discussed and agreed upon terms.  Terms that were Not Addressed Even if there are no minor children, it’s difficult to navigate through all of the terms that need to be con [...]

April 7, 2021 - {3 minutes to read} I understand that there are some mediators in favor of mediation via email. Those that I have encountered are conducting commercial or other multi-party mediations. The positive aspects include:  easier scheduling; parties from other states, or even countries, can participate without travel or time zone constraints; parties can take time to draft an appropriate and more reasoned response; and parties can easily find information from prior & [...]

February 19, 2021 -   In this video, we discuss the step when the child consultant comes into the mediation and speaks to the parents about their interview with the child. Parents don't have to be afraid that they are going to be judged in the meeting, or that anybody is going to be accusing them of being bad parents because they are having a conflict with their co-parent. The mediator and the child consultant will work together to make sure that the parents feel comfortable in the [...]