April 17, 2024 -   Clare Piro, a family and divorce mediator and attorney, emphasizes the importance of creating a child-focused parenting plan rather than getting stuck on labels like 50/50 custody or primary residential parent. She suggests shifting the conversation towards understanding the children's needs and considering factors, such as their developmental stage, activities, and preferences for structure or flexibility. Practical considerations like living arrangements and [...]

February 28, 2024 - The Greek philosopher Heraclitus is credited with the idea that the only constant in life is change. Or to put it another way, the only thing you can count on is change. There will be times when one parent wants to make a change to the co-parenting holiday schedule. This video lists two “don’ts” that you should observe if one parent is suggesting a change, especially during the holidays. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups, an [...]

January 24, 2024 - If you're concerned that you and your co-parent will have some difficulty in implementing the terms of your parenting plan, it's a good idea to include the name of a parent coordinator in your agreement. Having a pre-determined advocate on hand who can help you with that conflict is a good idea for many reasons.  If you would like more information about mediation, prenups and family law, check out my website — ClarePiroMediation.com. [...]

May 3, 2023 -   There has been lots of noise on the internet lately about drafting your own separation agreement. Some couples have come in with a piece of paper where they divided the assets and made co-parenting arrangements, but unfortunately, the document has to pass muster under New York law which is very strict. If it doesn’t, your agreement can be voided and you will have to start again. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups, and family law, [...]

January 25, 2023 -   I had a couple who came to mediation from family court. They worked through all the issues of their parenting plan, except for one minor issue. They decided to go back to family court and ask the judge to make the decision for them. Sounds easy, but that’s not exactly how it worked out. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups and family law, check out my website — ClarePiroMediation.com.     [...]

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September 15, 2022 - {3 minutes to read} If you and your spouse have a lot of conflict between you, you're going to want to have as much detail as possible in your parenting agreement. Here are a few tips that can help you to achieve that during your mediation.  1. Speak Up.    Clearly, your mediator is going to be aware of the level of conflict between the two of you and will raise the issues that are most commonly addressed in Separation Agreements in terms of parent [...]

November 18, 2021 -   Couples with opposite personality traits may thrive as one’s style is countered by the opposite style. When they divorce, the characteristics that attracted them to one another can now seem annoying and negative. Discussing between yourselves can lead to fights, but mediation can allow you to frame your differences in more positive ways. [...]

September 24, 2021 -   You're going through a separation and your communication with your co-parent is awful. You fight about everything. You're wondering: ''How are we ever going to be able to agree upon major decisions about our children, and what are we going to do if we can't make any decisions?'' Your answer to that might be: ''Well, maybe I should just say I'll be the sole decision-maker and I'll ask for sole custody.'' While that sounds rational to you, it's not going to have [...]

August 12, 2021 -   There are many special occasions to share in your life and the lives of your children. When divorcing, however, those occasions can become mini-battlegrounds, causing discomfort to visitors and your children. If you have children, you will be co-parenting for life. In mediation, we can build in ways to handle conflicts as the lives of you and your children move forward. [...]

March 24, 2021 - My previous two videos on Child Inclusive Mediation discussed the child interview and the parent meeting. In this video, we look at the parenting plan that can be created as a result of the issues and concerns raised by the child consultant’s interview of the children. This plan is not a legal document, but an agreement between the parents in their own language which they can start to use immediately.   [...]

February 19, 2021 -   In this video, we discuss the step when the child consultant comes into the mediation and speaks to the parents about their interview with the child. Parents don't have to be afraid that they are going to be judged in the meeting, or that anybody is going to be accusing them of being bad parents because they are having a conflict with their co-parent. The mediator and the child consultant will work together to make sure that the parents feel comfortable in the [...]