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Mediation Blog

Topic: Attitude | 8 post(s).

March 3, 2022 - After my last video on grace, a colleague asked if I had any examples of parties showing grace in mediation. Actually, I have many but one from several years ago sticks out. The husband had done something that not only irreparably damaged the trust between the parties but also had a financial effect on the whole family. Even under those circumstances, the wife was able to show compassion and grace to the husband.     [...]

February 16, 2022 -   I became intrigued with the idea of grace after hearing an interview with Kirsten Powers about her book Saving Grace. A lot of what she said and wrote in the book really resonated with me. Especially in the last several years — we've been treating people with whom we disagree in terms of beliefs and ideas, not only with a lack of grace but with a lack of humanity. We just see them as the sum total of their ideas, as opposed to individuals with whom we may [...]

November 13, 2019 -   Prenups illicit very negative reactions, but there are a lot of valid reasons why someone would want a prenup and it doesn't have to mean that they think that your marriage is doomed to fail. You are going to want your marriage to be a collaboration and mediation is a collaborative way to create a prenuptial agreement. [...]

May 14, 2019 -   One of the aspects of divorce is the creation of “blended families” when there is remarriage afterwards that includes step-mothers, step-fathers, step-children, step-siblings, step-grandparents, etc. Navigating these new relationships can be awkward, but the lives of you and your children can be enriched by keeping an open mind with regard to new significant others as this video attests. [...]

February 19, 2019 - {3:00 minutes to read} In many cases, clients decide to separate as a mutual decision and come to mediation without assessing any blame or fault on the other. In many other cases, though, one party feels either that the other party is to blame (i.e., if the other person had an affair) or that the other person is at fault because he or she is the one who wants the divorce against the wish of the other to stay married. In those cases, a pervasive attitude of blame or fault [...]

January 23, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} It is likely that mediation can result in a negotiated agreement even if you mediate after you have entered litigation or tried negotiating through attorneys. But after having worked with couples who have first engaged in an adversarial process, I encountered distinctive behaviors that arose in the mediation which, while not unsurmountable, needed to be addressed. Of course, I can’t definitively state that it was the initial adversarial proc [...]

November 30, 2018 - {3:00 minutes to read} It’s an admonition that many a Hallmark holiday movie has been based upon  ---    "Be Careful What You Wish For." The usual plot is that someone wakes up in the life she always dreamed about, only to find out that the life she had was so much better. In the end, she gets to go back to that wonderful life she never fully appreciated and everything is grand after all. It would be nice if we got those chances in real life, [...]

March 17, 2015 - {3:30 minutes to read} . Do we choose our profession because of our basic personality, or does our profession cause us to form a certain personality trait? I've always had a “never say die” kind of attitude. I would always think that I could fix it or make it better, be it a relationship or a friend who was upset. I could fix just about anything that had gone awry. A basic problem solver. This attitude wasn't always to my advantage when it came to personal [...]

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