914.946.0848  .  contact  .  map & directions  .  subscribe  .  LinkedInFacebookTwitterGoogle+
Mediation Blog

Topic: Control | 21 post(s).

July 16, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} Since New York on PAUSE went into effect, parties have been mediating virtually — either online or by phone, and this may even continue as businesses begin to reopen. I would like to share with you some of the differences that I’ve noticed in my mediation meetings via Zoom. Technical Difficulties We all may be subject to an unstable internet connection and noisy distractions from dogs or others in your household. Your mediator should let [...]

June 3, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} I recently read an article in the New York Times by Dhruv Khullar, MD, in which he wrote about the possible detrimental health effects of feeling regret. Dr. Khullar believes that doctors often ignore the toll that regret can have on someone: “We often don’t explore the role regret might be playing in the distress many patients and families experience, or acknowledge it when it’s clear that it is contributing to their pain.” [...]

September 25, 2019 - {4 minutes to read}  At a recent conference for divorce and family mediators that I attended, I heard a panel consisting of judges, hearing officers and law clerks speak to the reality of the court process. Here are some of the negative consequences they raised: Timeframe Although there are rules that say the entire process in New York County would be “trial ready” in less than a year after filing, the reality is that it could be two years or more to g [...]

March 12, 2019 - {4:00 minutes to read} In his book Lying, Sam Harris explains how a seminar he took as an undergraduate led him on a path to believe that any lying, even what most may deem “a little white lie,” is harmful. The seminar was called The Ethical Analyst, and it focused on the question “Is it wrong to lie?” In the course, he learned that lies damage personal relationships and violate the public trust, whether they are big or small. The book caused me [...]

November 20, 2018 - {3:00 minutes to read} In the last post, I addressed the designation of beneficiaries of your life insurance in order to ensure the continuation of child or spousal support. While the continuation of support is important, there are some other issues about life insurance coverage that may need to be discussed in mediation. Employer-Provided Life Insurance Individual life insurance policies owned and paid for by the parties provide the most control and flexibility in ter [...]

October 26, 2018 - {4:00 minutes to read} Life insurance is not a topic most people are eager to speak about, let alone if you are separating. But life insurance is a topic you should be prepared to discuss in your mediation. Under New York law, a judge may order a party to obtain and maintain life insurance coverage naming as beneficiaries either the children (for child support) or the spouse (for maintenance) for so long as the party is obligated to pay child support and/or maintenance. [...]

April 12, 2018 - {4:30 minutes to read}  Over the years I’ve been mediating, I’ve been asked by potential clients if the following concerns would mean that they could not mediate their separation. Here are some of their questions and my responses:We disagree on everything.  Disagreement in mediation is to be expected. Since mediation is a process which aims to resolve conflict, a mediator is trained to help the two of you do just that. I am very angry at my spouse [...]

December 6, 2016 - {3:18 minutes to read} After my initial mediation training, I developed a sense of why I thought clients would choose to mediate their divorce. Since I was so invigorated by the knowledge of this amazing process, I assumed they would choose to mediate because they wanted to engage in a process in which they could learn how to communicate their interests to each other and then brainstorm creative resolutions to meet those interests in a collaborative and non-adversarial s [...]

June 21, 2016 - {3:12 minutes to read} Having been raised by a mother who once heard an ambulance and acted upon the belief that it carried my aunt, who, being 15 minutes late in picking her up, had, of course, been in a car accident, I’m a worrier. If I allow myself to go there, I can easily obsess about a car accident or a plane crash, things that can happen in an instant without warning and could drastically change my life. Then there are the things that are equally devastatin [...]

June 7, 2016 - {4:18 minutes to read} As Lesley Stahl was making the rounds on various talk shows, promoting her new book, Becoming Grandma, the Joys and Science of the New Grandparenting, I learned that the omnipresent Boomer generation has once again made its presence known and adopted its own version of being a grandparent. I was then inspired to do a little research—admittedly over the internet, so I am not attesting to complete accuracy. From my experience, though, what I f [...]

September 29, 2015 - {3:36 minutes to read} In a previous post, I discussed the difficulty faced by a mediator when he or she needs to consider whether or not the client’s right to self-determination should be controlling in the face of an agreement that could be considered unconscionable. In my initial consultation with clients, I try to draw the distinction for them between someone who: Is unable to fully participate in the mediation; Does not have the capacity to mediate [...]

September 1, 2015 - {3:30 minutes to read} I always stress the importance of the client's right of control in a mediated matter versus the loss of control clients experience in a litigation or in an attorney negotiated matter. My recent, 2nd personal brush with the legal system reminded me of the 1st, and brought the concept of client control in mediation to an ever greater importance for me. A few years before I became a mediator, and still litigated matters, I retained an attorney [...]

Page:[ 1 ]2
Search
Topics
Mediation (108) | Divorce (99) | Divorce Mediation (19) | Separation (16) | Mediator (13) | Conflict (10) | Child Support (10) | Litigation (10) | Communication (10) | Separation Agreement (9) | Attorney (7) | Co-Parenting (7) | Consultation (7) | Parenting (6) | Collaborative Divorce (6) | Clare A. Piro (6) | Clare A. Piro Mediation (6) | Children (5) | Parenting Plan (5) | CSSA (4) | Marital Assets (4) | Equitable Distribution (4) | Family (4) | Settlement (4) | Expenses (4) | Finances (4) | Agreement (4) | Child Inclusive Mediation (3) | Prenup (3) | Listening (3) | Relationships (3) | Divorce Agreement (3) | Assets (3) | Emotions (3) | Child Consultant (3) | Responsibility (3) | Separate Property (3) | Joint Decisions (3) | Divorce Coach (3) | Financial Professional (3) | Clients (3) | Divorce Mediator (3) | Divorce Finances (3) | Child Support Standards Act (3) | Divorce And Children (3) | Clare Piro (3) | Mediation Myths (3) | Marital Home (2) | Joint Decision Making (2) | Agreements (2) | Anxiety (2) | Attitude (2) | Marital Property (2) | Compromise (2) | Collaborative Practice (2) | Budgets (2) | Grace (2) | Spouse (2) | Humanity (2) | Post-Divorce Income (2) | Law Professionals (2) | Child Support Standards Act (CSSA) (2) | Step-Children (2) | CDFA (2) | Step-Father (2) | Consulting Attorney (2) | New York Child Support Statute (2) | Step-Mother (2) | Budget (2) | Pandemic (2) | Blended Families (2) | Separation Agreements (2) | Couples (2) | Informed Decisions (2) | Anger (2) | Unrequited Love (2) | Mediation Benefits (2) | College Expenses (2) | Mediation Versus Litigation (2) | Conflict During Mediation (2) | Settlement Agreements (2) | Family Court (2) | Bitterness (2) | Seperation (2) | Legislation (2) | Custody (2) | Equal Parenting Plan (2) | Apology (2) | Truth (2) | Mediate (2) | Moving Forward (2) | Calculating Support (2) | Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) (2) | A Neutral (1) | Non-Residential Parent (1) | Child Support Payment (1) | An Advocate (1) | NYs Child Support Guidelines (CSSA) (1) | Commitment (1) | Child's Best Interests (1) | Pathological Liar (1) | Child Focused Mediation (1) | New Year’s Resolutions (1) | Intention (1) | Feelings (1) | Joseph Goldstein (1) | Expectations (1) | Anxious Thoughts (1) | Custody Determination (1) | Tough Decisions (1) | Older Adults (1) | Eldercare (1) | Older Parents (1) | Domestic Violence (1) | Primary Caretaker (1) | Elder Mediation (1) | Agreement To Mediate (1) | Divorce Agreement Terms (1) | Court Order (1) | Heard (1) | Unhappy Relationship (1) | Lack Of Communication (1) | Remain Healthy (1) | Maggie O’Connor (1) | Global Pandemic (1) | COVID19 (1) | Matrimonial Cases (1) | Couples Counseling (1) | Custody Disputes (1) | Multiple Assets (1) | FinancialPortfolio (1) | Divorce Terms (1) | Parenting Agreement (1) | Complicated Finances (1) | Mediation Misconceptions (1) | Understood (1) | Power Of Regret (1) | 50/50 Parenting Plan (1) | Family Mediations (1) | Transition Day (1) | On-Duty Parent Responsibilities (1) | Children And Divorce (1) | Co-parenting (1) | Parenting Schedules (1) | 50/50 Parenting (1) | Caucus (1) | Technical Difficulties (1) | Guilt (1) | Mediating Virtually (1) | Mediating Onine (1) | Religious Holidays (1) | Cultural Holidays (1) | Parental Holiday Sharing (1) | Holiday Season (1) | Separating (1) | Mediating Emails (1) | Retirement Plans (1) | Communicating (1) | Cancer (1) | Successful Mediations (1) | Disagreements (1) | Ideas (1) | Beliefs (1) | Saving Grace By Kirsten Powers (1) | Kirsten Powers (1) | Court (1) | Judge (1) | Kindness (1) | Pro-Rata (1) | Support Add-ons (1) | Bonuses (1) | Commissions (1) | Income Level (1) | Actuarial Company (1) | Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO) (1) | Righteous Anger (1) | Matrimonial Practice (1) | Alternative Dispute Resolution (1) | Unmarried (1) | Being Heard (1) | Divorce Needs (1) | Collaboration (1) | Decision Makers (1) | Estate Documents (1) | Cohabitation Agreement (1) | Cohabitating (1) | Emotional Trauma (1) | Mediation Process (1) | File A Petition (1) | Parent Coordinator (PC) (1) | Final Decisions (1) | Parent Coordinator (1) | Contentment (1) | Happiness (1) | AcceptableOutcome (1) | Pension (1) | ADR (1) | Tone Of Voice (1) | Lack Of Focus (1) | Legal Rights (1) | Being Understood (1) | Pensions (1) | Retirement (1) | Pension Plans (1) | COVID 19 (1) | Default Provisions (1) | Thrive (1) | Family Occasions (1) | Postnup (1) | Depression (1) | Languish (1) | Waiving Spousal Support (1) | Postnuptial Agreements (1) | New York’s Child Support And Maintenance (1) | Facial Expression (1) | Honest Conversation (1) | CoParenting (1) | Support Connection (1) | Perspective (1) | Presumptive ADR Program (1) | Ovarian Cancer (1) | New York Family Court (1) | Family Court Presumptive ADR Program (1) | Parenting Styles (1) | Breast Cancer (1) | Coparenting (1) | Maintaining Calm (1) | DecisionMaking (1) | Opposites (1) | Personality (1) | Separate Property Credit (1) | Hope (1) | Advocacy (1) | Empowerment (1) | Support (1) | Social Distancing (1) | Seller (1) | Coronavirus (1) | Power (1) | Unemployment (1) | Seperation Agreement (1) | Payments (1) | Extremes (1) | Fall (1) | Conflicy (1) | Acknowledgement (1) | School Year (1) | Disclosure (1) | Kids (1) | Summer (1) | Marriage (1) | Resolution (1) | Scarcity (1) | Abundance (1) | Divorce Law (1) | Moving On (1) | Parents (1) | Baby Boomers (1) | Maritial Assets (1) | Permanent Agreement (1) | Temporary Agreement (1) | Installment Agreements (1) | Joint Legal Custody (1) | Negative Communication (1) | Divorce Papers (1) | Retirement Account (1) | Maritial Property (1) | Contribution (1) | Transmutation (1) | Commingling (1) | Married Couples (1) | Hurricane Harvey (1) | Compassion (1) | Nesting (1) | College (1) | Grandparents (1) | Living Apart (1) | Accusations Of Delay (1) | Holidays Post-Divorce (1) | Specialist (1) | Mental Health (1) | Equity (1) | House (1) | Finding Love After Divorce (1) | Post-Divorce Dating (1) | Alone At The Holidays (1) | Holiday Blues (1) | Change (1) | Scared Of Divorce (1) | Fear Of Divorce (1) | Halloween (1) | Moving On After Divorce (1) | Joint Physical Custody (1) | Parenting Post-Divorce (1) | Parenting Plans (1) | Relocation (1) | Difficult Clients (1) | Living Together (1) | Blame (1) | Effects On Family (1) | Older Dogs (1) | Adopt Shelter Dogs (1) | Dogs (1) | New York (1) | Self-talk (1) | Advice (1) | 2015 (1) | Self-determination (1) | Year In Review (1) | Mindfulness (1) | Equality (1) | Balance (1) | Control (1) | New York State (1) | Self Determination (1) | Tentative Agreements (1) | Lack Of Trust (1) | Meditate (1) | Frame Of Mind (1) | Lawyer (1) | Fear Of Separation (1) | PostNup (1) | Post Nuptial (1) | Time To Process (1) | Patience (1) | Marriage Counseling (1) | Reluctant Spouse (1) | Family Law Software (1) | Telling Your Spouse (1) | Buyer (1) | Cash Flow (1) | Interest Payments (1) | Equity Loan (1) | Refinance (1) | Divorce Assets (1) | Mental Health Professional (1) | Financial Information (1) | Dividing House Asset (1) | Attitudes Toward Prenups (1) | Property Distribution (1) | Equitable Distribution Statute (1) | Apologizing (1) | But (1) | Fiancé (1) | Prenuptial Agreement (Prenup) (1) | Collaborative Process (1) | Asset Distribution (1) | Financial Documents (1) | Marital Concerns (1) | Prenuptial Agreement (1) | Court Vs Mediation (1) | Needs Vs Wants (1) | Negotiation (1) | Entitlement (1) | Court Process (1) | Emotional Attachment (1) | Ex-Spouse (1) | Financial Costs (1) | Intervention (1) | Married (1) | Affair (1) | Bankruptcy (1) | Wife (1) | Husband (1) | Financial Situation (1) | Custodial Parent (1) | Dreaming (1) | Personal Relationships (1) | Therapy (1) | Beneficiary (1) | Spousal Support (1) | Life Insurance (1) | Settlement Term (1) | Settle Agreement (1) | Joint Account (1) | Settlement Agreement (1) | Public Trust (1) | Accepting Responsibility (1) | MediationSession (1) | Taking Responsibility (1) | Remarriage After Divorce (1) | Family Enrichment (1) | Attitudes (1) | Significant Other (1) | AttorneyPresence (1) | FamilyMediation (1) | LawyerDivorceMediation (1) | Lies (1) | Matrimonial Dispute (1) | Perfection (1) | Holiday Preparations (1) | Work Stress (1) | Spouses (1) | Dishonest (1) | Little White Lies (1) | Consulting (1) |
Connect
Attorney Advertising

The contents of this editorial should not be considered legal advice. The information provided in this editorial is intended to be general information and is not intended to be a substitute for a consultation with an attorney. Each case and situation is different and must be handled based upon the specific facts and circumstances unique to that case. For specific answers to questions on an individual case, it is best to consult with an attorney. Attorney Advertising

Close Announcement

Online Mediation Available

In response to COVID-19 I am providing family and divorce mediation services online. Click to learn more.