May 3, 2023 -   There has been lots of noise on the internet lately about drafting your own separation agreement. Some couples have come in with a piece of paper where they divided the assets and made co-parenting arrangements, but unfortunately, the document has to pass muster under New York law which is very strict. If it doesn’t, your agreement can be voided and you will have to start again. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups, and family law, [...]

February 22, 2023 - This article is the beginning of a series about the disposition of the marital home for couples with children. When there are no children in the marriage, the usual plan for a divorcing couple is to sell and divide the proceeds. When there are children, one party may buy out the other in order for the children to remain in their school district, but today’s higher interest rates may complicate the buyout and the divorce.If you would like more information about me [...]

November 16, 2022 -   No couple gets married expecting to be divorced, but when creating a prenuptial agreement most couples decide to include a term defining what will be considered marital and separate property. If the couple defines them in a way that limits them, then obviously, there will be limited assets subject to distribution if they do get divorced. If you would like more information about mediation and prenups, check out my website — ClarePiroMediation.com. [...]

May 4, 2022 -   While marriage is the usual path when two people are in love and want to live together, some couples decide to live together without being married and without bothering to get a cohabitation agreement. This may be all well and good until it isn’t. Without the Agreement, when the couple breaks up or one party dies, there can be a slew of problems around the joint property acquired during the relationship. If you would like more information about mediation, [...]

November 18, 2021 -   Couples with opposite personality traits may thrive as one’s style is countered by the opposite style. When they divorce, the characteristics that attracted them to one another can now seem annoying and negative. Discussing between yourselves can lead to fights, but mediation can allow you to frame your differences in more positive ways. [...]

August 26, 2020 -   When divorcing, some couples become somewhat obsessed about splitting everything evenly. When it comes to the kids, a 50/50 parenting plan without some flexibility can potentially do more harm than good. Focusing on how much time your kids are spending with the other parent can be self-defeating when it comes to your relationship with the children.  [...]

June 30, 2020 -   Though the end of year holidays may be long over when this video is published, those holidays prompted my discussion of this topic for divorced couples. Sharing the kids during all of the holidays throughout the year is often a difficult subject to tackle, but there are some practical ways to work out the logistics so that your kids will have good memories of spending holiday time with their parents.  [...]

May 20, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} As a divorce mediator, it’s not surprising that I work with many couples who experience a lack of communication. Since that lack of communication is now being coupled with spending an inordinate amount of time with your spouse during the pandemic, you may consider this an opportunity to improve your communication. In Listening During a Pandemic, Kate Murphy writes that while a pandemic has the likelihood of causing an increase in divorce, it ca [...]

September 25, 2019 - {4 minutes to read}  At a recent conference for divorce and family mediators that I attended, I heard a panel consisting of judges, hearing officers and law clerks speak to the reality of the court process. Here are some of the negative consequences they raised: Timeframe Although there are rules that say the entire process in New York County would be “trial ready” in less than a year after filing, the reality is that it could be two years or more to g [...]

July 10, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} In my last video, I promised some creative win/win options that you could take when it came to the division of your home. Since they could be a little complicated and hard to follow, I thought it would be better to present them in a written blog.    Can’t Refinance Right Now Let’s say that you both agree that there will be a buyout and a refinance, but it will take some time for the “buyer” to qualify for a loan [...]

January 23, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} It is likely that mediation can result in a negotiated agreement even if you mediate after you have entered litigation or tried negotiating through attorneys. But after having worked with couples who have first engaged in an adversarial process, I encountered distinctive behaviors that arose in the mediation which, while not unsurmountable, needed to be addressed. Of course, I can’t definitively state that it was the initial adversarial proc [...]

August 17, 2018 - {3:42 minutes to read}  One of the major benefits of mediation is that parties make the decisions about their lives and the lives of their children. Self-determination is an awesome responsibility in that regard, and couples should be prepared to accept that responsibility when choosing to mediate. To me, this would mean that parties should make sure that they have all of the resources they may need in order to make the best decisions they can. Choosing the Mediat [...]