December 13, 2022 -   A prenuptial agreement isn't in itself fair or unfair — It depends on what the terms are. There are two ways to address the issue of fairness, either through attorney negotiation or mediation. Throughout my series on prenups, I’ve suggested that mediation is the best process for this type of discussion, especially in terms of whether or not you find the terms to be fair. [...]

November 16, 2022 -   No couple gets married expecting to be divorced, but when creating a prenuptial agreement most couples decide to include a term defining what will be considered marital and separate property. If the couple defines them in a way that limits them, then obviously, there will be limited assets subject to distribution if they do get divorced. If you would like more information about mediation and prenups, check out my website — ClarePiroMediation.com. [...]

May 4, 2022 -   While marriage is the usual path when two people are in love and want to live together, some couples decide to live together without being married and without bothering to get a cohabitation agreement. This may be all well and good until it isn’t. Without the Agreement, when the couple breaks up or one party dies, there can be a slew of problems around the joint property acquired during the relationship. If you would like more information about mediation, [...]

October 29, 2021 -   If one party takes their separate property and puts it toward a jointly owned home, they may be entitled, by NY law, to a separate property credit when divorcing. This can be difficult because people don't lead their married lives in anticipation of getting a divorce, so the separate property credit can have both practical and emotional consequences. [...]

May 18, 2021 - {3 minutes to read} The idea of a prenuptial agreement is familiar to most people — an agreement that a couple can enter into before their marriage that can provide how property and debt will be distributed in the event of death or a divorce. It can also provide for paying or waiving spousal support. But what exactly is a postnuptial agreement, and why would anyone want one? A postnuptial agreement is an agreement that a married couple can create to do the very th [...]

June 3, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} I recently read an article in the New York Times by Dhruv Khullar, MD, in which he wrote about the possible detrimental health effects of feeling regret. Dr. Khullar believes that doctors often ignore the toll that regret can have on someone: “We often don’t explore the role regret might be playing in the distress many patients and families experience, or acknowledge it when it’s clear that it is contributing to their pain.” [...]

February 19, 2019 - {3:00 minutes to read} In many cases, clients decide to separate as a mutual decision and come to mediation without assessing any blame or fault on the other. In many other cases, though, one party feels either that the other party is to blame (i.e., if the other person had an affair) or that the other person is at fault because he or she is the one who wants the divorce against the wish of the other to stay married. In those cases, a pervasive attitude of blame or fault [...]

December 5, 2017 - {3:42 minutes to read} I was talking to a colleague recently about a mediation. She was surprised that it took as many meetings as it did to reach a resolution and that the couple almost terminated the process. It was a relatively short-term marriage of a few years, and they had no children, so she had not expected that it would be difficult. I agree that expectations of difficulty are often misleading. At an initial consultation, I can only judge a mediation’s di [...]

November 15, 2017 - {3:42 minutes to read} It’s perfectly normal for most married couples to live their lives without knowledge of the intricacies of separate and marital property in New York matrimonial law. Unfortunately, though, that lack of knowledge can lead to common and innocent “mistakes” and have unintended consequences under the law.Our Typical CouplesA couple maintains only joint accounts and holds all property with the other named on all assets. This has been w [...]

August 2, 2017 - {4:24 minutes to read} Nesting is a shared parenting concept that allows the children to stay in the marital home while the parents go back and forth. The idea is that the children will be able to remain in one familiar place, have no concerns about where they are on what day or what they need to take with them. Typically, parents who choose this will be sharing time in the home with the children on an equal basis. To see if this might work for you, consider the followi [...]

May 19, 2017 - {4:00 minutes to read} I often caution clients against including language in their agreement which is basically just an agreement to agree: anything that begins with “The parties will agree upon...” or “The parties agree to review...” But it depends on the issue and on the couple. Sometimes it makes sense not to spend an enormous amount of time either on something that is not all that contentious or something not likely to happen. Other times, th [...]

June 7, 2016 - {4:18 minutes to read} As Lesley Stahl was making the rounds on various talk shows, promoting her new book, Becoming Grandma, the Joys and Science of the New Grandparenting, I learned that the omnipresent Boomer generation has once again made its presence known and adopted its own version of being a grandparent. I was then inspired to do a little research—admittedly over the internet, so I am not attesting to complete accuracy. From my experience, though, what I f [...]