October 25, 2023 - The past couple of videos have dealt with mediating your divorce if there are trust issues with your spouse. The most distressing and emotional trust issue is, of course, infidelity. A successful mediation will require you to focus on what your spouse is saying, not how you feel. And most importantly, you must base everything on the best interests of your entire family, including the unfaithful spouse. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups, and fa [...]

September 27, 2023 -   You would think that a lack of trust would definitely make your mediation really tough, if not impossible, but it can be done and a settlement reached. Some couples even find their way to begin the process of rebuilding some of the trust that was lost. If you would like more information about mediation, prenups, and family law, check out my website — ClarePiroMediation.com.   [...]

August 8, 2023 -   There are times in mediation when you may want to speak with the mediator about an issue like the mediation is not progressing as expected. It is perfectly fine to reach out to the mediator with your concerns. If you are concerned about your safety — contact the mediator immediately and let them know. If the situation is sensitive, the mediator may suggest a caucus where they will meet with each of you individually. Most importantly, if you have a concern [...]

September 15, 2022 - {3 minutes to read} If you and your spouse have a lot of conflict between you, you're going to want to have as much detail as possible in your parenting agreement. Here are a few tips that can help you to achieve that during your mediation.  1. Speak Up.    Clearly, your mediator is going to be aware of the level of conflict between the two of you and will raise the issues that are most commonly addressed in Separation Agreements in terms of parent [...]

December 2, 2021 -   Family Court Mediation is a topic I’ve never spoken about, but I have been working with clients in Family Court recently. Family Court is a very busy court and takes many months and years to get through the process. Mediation is a much more streamlined process. First, mediate, but if you are already involved in Family Court ask about mediation and see if you can get into the Family Court Presumptive ADR Program.   [...]

April 7, 2021 - {3 minutes to read} I understand that there are some mediators in favor of mediation via email. Those that I have encountered are conducting commercial or other multi-party mediations. The positive aspects include:  easier scheduling; parties from other states, or even countries, can participate without travel or time zone constraints; parties can take time to draft an appropriate and more reasoned response; and parties can easily find information from prior & [...]

March 24, 2021 - My previous two videos on Child Inclusive Mediation discussed the child interview and the parent meeting. In this video, we look at the parenting plan that can be created as a result of the issues and concerns raised by the child consultant’s interview of the children. This plan is not a legal document, but an agreement between the parents in their own language which they can start to use immediately.   [...]

October 14, 2020 - {4 minutes to read} When I’m working with parents and we are discussing what each proposes for a parenting plan, I ask them to phrase their proposal in terms of what is in the child’s best interests, and not necessarily what’s best for them. What does “best interests of the child” actually mean though? If we use the standard of what a judge would consider when making a custody determination in an adversarial proceeding, these are some of th [...]

September 16, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} In an earlier post, I described the benefits of using a financial professional who acts as a neutral in mediation, but sometimes that may not work for you. Here are some factors to consider when deciding which will be best in your case. An Advocate If you choose to have the financial person be an advocate, they would be acting in the same way that an attorney would act on your behalf — looking out for your interests and how to achieve the bes [...]

July 16, 2020 - {3 minutes to read} Since New York on PAUSE went into effect, parties have been mediating virtually — either online or by phone, and this may even continue as businesses begin to reopen. I would like to share with you some of the differences that I’ve noticed in my mediation meetings via Zoom. Technical Difficulties We all may be subject to an unstable internet connection and noisy distractions from dogs or others in your household. Your mediator should let [...]

April 21, 2020 - {4 minutes to read} As I’m writing this on March 30, 2020, the Courts in New York State are open only for emergency relief, such as family offenses/orders of protection and child protective matters. Parents who are having non-emergency custody disputes are unable to access courts at this time to resolve their dispute. In an article in the New York Law Journal, Judge Jeffrey Sunshine, the Statewide Coordinating Judge for Matrimonial Cases, was praised on two divers [...]

March 13, 2020 - {4 minutes to read} Are all family disputes the same? Of course not. Divorce mediation is different from mediation involving the contest or interpretation of the provisions of a Will or Trust Agreement. But clearly, they have similarities: Ongoing Relationships While some familial relationships may have always been troubled, it’s likely that at some time, the parties probably got along well. And they may need to continue to get along for the sake of attending ext [...]