914.946.0848  .  contact  .  map & directions  .  subscribe  . 
Mediation Blog

Topic: Mediator | 57 post(s).

September 25, 2019 - {4 minutes to read}  At a recent conference for divorce and family mediators that I attended, I heard a panel consisting of judges, hearing officers and law clerks speak to the reality of the court process. Here are some of the negative consequences they raised: Timeframe Although there are rules that say the entire process in New York County would be “trial ready” in less than a year after filing, the reality is that it could be two years or more to g [...]

September 11, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} Both the clients and the mediator want to be sure that the first meeting is productive, both because of the cost involved and because everyone wants to feel that something was accomplished and momentum is building. That’s why at the initial consultation I suggest clients to do the following before scheduling the first meeting: Review the checklist I provide. To the extent that it’s productive for them to do so, I suggest that clients [...]

August 7, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} Separating from someone you’ve loved, trusted, and who, most likely, was your best friend, is an incredibly scary concept on a deeply personal level. On top of that, you are also likely worrying about how this will affect your children, as well as how you will afford to pay your bills. It’s completely understandable that you’re concerned and frightened by both the process and the future. Add to that, how hard it would be to expre [...]

June 5, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} In a previous post, I wrote about the enormous impact that a sincere apology could have on another person. There is, though, a very significant step that must come first. Taking Responsibility for Our Actions Sometimes, the intentions behind the words said or the actions taken are crystal clear, and it is impossible to say with any semblance of credibility — “I didn’t mean to do that.”   More often, though, it&rsquo [...]

April 23, 2019 -   In the past, as a lawyer it was very uncommon for me to either attend a mediation with a client or have clients bring their attorneys to a mediation with me. That was something that I always felt was a rarity in family mediation. Since I’ve become a divorce mediator, I’m not sure why, but that dynamic seems to be changing. I’m finding these meetings to be productive, and the attorneys’ presence to be helpful. [...]

April 3, 2019 - {3:30 minutes to read} There are two diametrically opposed views as to the value of an attorney versus a mediator. In terms of settling a matrimonial matter, each believes the other is not necessary. “There is no need for a mediator.” Some matrimonial attorneys believe that two attorneys can negotiate for the parties and reach a settlement — why the need for a third party? After all, attorneys have been settling cases forever, and it works.   M [...]

August 17, 2018 - {3:42 minutes to read}  One of the major benefits of mediation is that parties make the decisions about their lives and the lives of their children. Self-determination is an awesome responsibility in that regard, and couples should be prepared to accept that responsibility when choosing to mediate. To me, this would mean that parties should make sure that they have all of the resources they may need in order to make the best decisions they can. Choosing the Mediat [...]

July 27, 2018 - {3:00 minutes to read}  I’ve had clients who completed their mediation and signed an agreement in a few months and others who take years to complete a mediation. While complexity and the amount of conflict surely play a role, there are clearly other factors in play. Not ready for the process yet. It’s unusual for both parties to be in the same place in terms of accepting the end of the relationship. That said, both may agree to move forward with the se [...]

May 23, 2018 - {2:42 minutes to read}  As a divorce mediator, I certainly expect to have clients express strong emotions, including anger. But I’ve encountered a few clients recently who made me recall my earlier post on the difference between anger and bitterness. The definitions of anger and bitterness are similar: Anger: a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility. Bitterness: anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly; resentment. The definit [...]

May 9, 2018 - {4:00 minutes to read}  Separating is a painful and emotionally draining process. Needlessly prolonging the process will only add to that, however, it is within your power to insure that time in the meetings is not wasted. Here are some additional steps that you can take to insure that mediation fees remain reasonable by limiting the number of sessions that are needed. Know what mediation is all about and why you’re doing it. When I ask clients why they have [...]

April 25, 2018 - {4:00 minutes to read} The mutual goal to reduce the financial costs of a separation is a primary motivation for most of my clients, second only to the desire to reach an agreement with as little rancor as possible. Regarding the financial costs, however, there are steps that clients can take to ensure that mediation fees remain reasonable by limiting the number of sessions that are needed. Complete Your Work Between Meetings At the end of my summary of the meeting, I [...]

April 12, 2018 - {4:30 minutes to read}  Over the years I’ve been mediating, I’ve been asked by potential clients if the following concerns would mean that they could not mediate their separation. Here are some of their questions and my responses:We disagree on everything.  Disagreement in mediation is to be expected. Since mediation is a process which aims to resolve conflict, a mediator is trained to help the two of you do just that. I am very angry at my spouse [...]

Page:[ 1 ]2345
Search
Topics
Divorce (72) | Mediation (71) | Divorce Mediation (12) | Mediator (11) | Conflict (9) | Child Support (8) | Separation Agreement (7) | Litigation (7) | Collaborative Divorce (6) | Consultation (6) | Clare A. Piro Mediation (6) | Clare A. Piro (6) | Separation (5) | Parenting (4) | Children (4) | Settlement (4) | Attorney (4) | Family (4) | Finances (4) | Clients (3) | Communication (3) | Child Support Standards Act (3) | Expenses (3) | Clare Piro (3) | Divorce And Children (3) | Truth (2) | Seperation (2) | Agreement (2) | Mediation Benefits (2) | Mediation Versus Litigation (2) | Couples (2) | Divorce Mediator (2) | Legislation (2) | Conflict During Mediation (2) | College Expenses (2) | Apology (2) | Custody (2) | Step-Children (2) | Settlement Agreements (2) | Assets (2) | Calculating Support (2) | Bitterness (2) | Anger (2) | Post-Divorce Income (2) | Mediate (2) | Unrequited Love (2) | CSSA (2) | Parenting Plan (2) | Step-Father (2) | Relationships (2) | Mediation Myths (2) | Child Support Standards Act (CSSA) (2) | Step-Mother (2) | Moving Forward (2) | Divorce Finances (2) | Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) (2) | Public Trust (1) | Custodial Parent (1) | Personal Relationships (1) | Bankruptcy (1) | Affair (1) | Wife (1) | Married (1) | Husband (1) | Settlement Agreement (1) | Financial Situation (1) | Settle Agreement (1) | Tentative Agreements (1) | Accusations Of Delay (1) | Lack Of Trust (1) | Permanent Agreement (1) | Temporary Agreement (1) | Joint Decision Making (1) | Joint Legal Custody (1) | Installment Agreements (1) | Financial Costs (1) | Joint Account (1) | Beneficiary (1) | Therapy (1) | Dreaming (1) | Spousal Support (1) | Life Insurance (1) | Lies (1) | Divorce Coach (1) | Settlement Term (1) | Intervention (1) | Remarriage After Divorce (1) | Telling Your Spouse (1) | Reluctant Spouse (1) | Frame Of Mind (1) | Marriage Counseling (1) | Seller (1) | Buyer (1) | Refinance (1) | Equity Loan (1) | Interest Payments (1) | Cash Flow (1) | Patience (1) | Time To Process (1) | Financial Information (1) | Budgets (1) | Financial Documents (1) | Court Process (1) | Family Law Software (1) | Mental Health Professional (1) | Post Nuptial (1) | PostNup (1) | Fear Of Separation (1) | Lawyer (1) | Divorce Assets (1) | Emotional Attachment (1) | Perfection (1) | Matrimonial Dispute (1) | LawyerDivorceMediation (1) | MediationSession (1) | Holiday Preparations (1) | Work Stress (1) | Dishonest (1) | Spouses (1) | Separation Agreements (1) | Anxiety (1) | FamilyMediation (1) | AttorneyPresence (1) | Accepting Responsibility (1) | Ex-Spouse (1) | Marital Home (1) | Dividing House Asset (1) | Taking Responsibility (1) | Spouse (1) | Blended Families (1) | Significant Other (1) | Attitudes (1) | Family Enrichment (1) | Little White Lies (1) | Unemployment (1) | Balance (1) | Equality (1) | Mindfulness (1) | Year In Review (1) | Control (1) | New York State (1) | Difficult Clients (1) | Self-determination (1) | Self Determination (1) | 2015 (1) | Blame (1) | Dogs (1) | Adopt Shelter Dogs (1) | Older Dogs (1) | Agreements (1) | Budget (1) | Advice (1) | Self-talk (1) | New York (1) | Change (1) | Relocation (1) | Halloween (1) | Fear Of Divorce (1) | Scared Of Divorce (1) | Moving On After Divorce (1) | Joint Physical Custody (1) | Parenting Plans (1) | Co-Parenting (1) | Parenting Post-Divorce (1) | Holiday Blues (1) | Holidays Post-Divorce (1) | Equity (1) | Mental Health (1) | Specialist (1) | House (1) | Finding Love After Divorce (1) | Alone At The Holidays (1) | Consulting Attorney (1) | Post-Divorce Dating (1) | Listening (1) | Compromise (1) | College (1) | Nesting (1) | Compassion (1) | Contribution (1) | Parents (1) | Responsibility (1) | Moving On (1) | Disclosure (1) | Hurricane Harvey (1) | Married Couples (1) | Maritial Assets (1) | Retirement Account (1) | Divorce Papers (1) | Maritial Property (1) | Transmutation (1) | Marital Property (1) | Separate Property (1) | Commingling (1) | Seperation Agreement (1) | Payments (1) | Divorce Law (1) | Abundance (1) | Scarcity (1) | Grandparents (1) | Baby Boomers (1) | Effects On Family (1) | Living Together (1) | Living Apart (1) | Resolution (1) | Marriage (1) | Conflicy (1) | Fall (1) | Extremes (1) | Acknowledgement (1) | Power (1) | Summer (1) | Kids (1) | School Year (1) | Negative Communication (1) |
Connect
Attorney Advertising

The contents of this editorial should not be considered legal advice. The information provided in this editorial is intended to be general information and is not intended to be a substitute for a consultation with an attorney. Each case and situation is different and must be handled based upon the specific facts and circumstances unique to that case. For specific answers to questions on an individual case, it is best to consult with an attorney. Attorney Advertising